As mentioned in my previous post, we're living in an age of what's best and "what's best" seems to be shoved down parents' throat from numerous sources. A lot of time this advice is out of date, inaccurate and just plain unwanted.
We're obsessed with putting a label on everything and micro analyzing it to the point where everyone goes crazy and nothing seems right. Parenting seems to be another victim. So here's my theory of what parenting style is best.
Are you ready for it?
INSTINCT....GUT......INTUITION whatever you want to call it.
Before science and technology......before research....before studies, mothers mothered and fathers fathered. Things just worked. Maybe not all the time but most of the time they did.
Every parent is their own person. As much as people may think otherwise, a baby is their own person too. To negate how a relationship goes between two individuals the same way all the time is ridiculous. I believe a mother naturally knows what is right for her child when it comes to comforting, bed time, teaching. etc. Of course it's always good to listen to others with experience but in the end, a mother has to follow her gut. It's why she has it.
Like all parenting styles, there is a fault to this one.
Women are so deaf to that inner voice of intuition their rendered incapable it seems of mothering the way she should. Modern day has taught us to trust doctors and science before we trust our body. We rely so heavily on the latest research that we forget to rely on ourselves.
Even if you're not deaf, outside voices drown out your own to the point where you can't hear it at all or you can't hear it well.
I've gone through some trying times with in-laws and parents and doctors and nurses and studies.....
I thrown up my hands and decided to take them as suggestions and to just do what I feel is right for my baby and what's right for me.
I breastfeed. I wear my baby. I go to her the minute I hear her cry. I hold her until she's asleep. I feed on demand. I sing and read so she can hear my voice. When she's awake and alert, I spend every minute with her. I do skin to skin.
All these things feel right. When I'm told not to go to her when she cries, I still go because I cant fight the urge to try and comfort her. When I'm told not to rock her to sleep, I still do. I don't do it because I want to, I just do it with out realizing. So why fight my body and mind's instinct. I say follow it. We are all still animals and we need to learn how to listen to the knowledge buried deep within our beings.